Examon Attack

Still remember Digimon, Pokemon, Doraemon? For those of you who didn’t have a childhood (typical of many Singaporean kids) or do not have younger siblings to let you get in touch with all these entertainment bits-and-pieces, DON’T BE SAD LAH. Hanxiang jiejie *sayang* ok? Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll recognize the monster I’ll be introducing to you. CONFIRM, because it’s so in-the-air and so 'in' these days. Everyone’s talking about it! Alright, give it up to.. The Examon!

As you all know (ok, maybe not for those who didn’t have a childhood or younger siblings.. blah!), each of these monster characters always has their unique special powers and traits. Take for example, my favourite monster in Pokemon, Charmander.

Type: Fire
Ability: Blaze
Height: 2’0”
Weight: 19 LBS

Don’t believe that I’m knowledgeable enough to know about such stuff? Go verify it at
http://www.pokemon.com/, under Pokedex. Hmm!

Anyway, Examon has its special attack abilities and traits too. Information are as follows:

Type: Stress

Abilities:
1) Graffiti – Examon uses black crayons to colour your eyebags and releases pandas which are supposed to be kept in the Zoo into the wild.
2) Confusion – Examon shows up when you are not studying, penetrates you and fills you up with so much guilt that you’re forced to go back to your books. Then, when you see your books, Examon beckons you to the bed or anything that has zero relation to revision. And you ask, “What the hell do you want with me?!”
3) Conditional Detox – Sometimes Examon offers you the chance of purging the poison in you by allowing you to complete your exam. Exam = End of stress for a particular subject. BUT in return, you have to have your head squashed by it so much that you can’t do anything else after that. Sometimes, you have to do this twice a day. And the thing is, if Examon offers you Conditional Detox, you just gotta take it up, or prepare to die on the spot. Examon has got character and doesn’t give a damn about democracy.

Height: The height of all your semester notes and books piled up.

Weight: Infinite. Always be crushed by it. ALWAYS.

Ok, all that said, this is what I have concluded from my observations done in the library and all around the school, observations of them. Afterall, you can always choose to NOT be defeated by evil forces. Like ME.

Yesterday I had two papers. Two Conditional Detox attacks.

About half an hour before the first paper, everyone was frantically doing last-minute revision. Guess what I was doing? Of course, I was also frantically..

Doing my hair in the toilet. Bad hair day lah, no choice.

Okok, it’s actually not that bad. I’m not that bad. I was just UNCONSCIOUSLY disturbing everyone with my nonsense. I think it was nonsense to them because..

Meihui: “Siao Zar Bor (mad woman) leh! Don’t need to study one ah?”

I think in the depths of their hearts, they (Hanxu’s friends. It was a retake subject.) wanted to ask me to go and die and quit disturbing them. So much for trying to help them destress before the paper. *sad*

After the exam, everyone was frantically checking answers with each other.

Me: “Don’t ask me. Don’t offer me your 'correct' answers to let me check against mine. NOT MY STYLE. It’s over.”

Not that I want to ACT cool or I AM cool ok? I just can’t bear to see their depressed expressions when they realize they have different answers from mine, because I have ALL the RIGHT answers.

Ya RIGHT.

Just don’t see the point in checking answers. FOR WHAT? Check already, realize you’re wrong, and get high? SIAO! I’m still far from being a saddist who self-tortures.

So I decided to try something else, like watching Eight Below with Hanxu in the evening. Nice show. Laughter, screams, warmth, tears, ALL in one show. Go catch it!

For the girls: Did you just feel 873548 watts of electricity?

Note: It takes 40 watts to power a lightbulb.

For dog lovers: Seriously, they're really what's worth watching about this show! SERIOUS LAH!

Ala! This was supposed to be one whole poster, but the stupiak website divided it into two. And being ME, I just had to find some explanation for it, therefore the captions.

Next up, Take The Lead. I MUST watch this one. No care!

I got a feeling I’ll be whacked by a certain Ah-Peh who’s been asking me to study, study, study, if he gets to know about how much I’m wasting my time. But I wouldn’t get whacked, because he wouldn’t know. *smiles victoriously and widely like an idiot* Ok lah, Ah-Peh is actually quite my guardian angel sometimes, but Ah-Peh is an irritating one. Ok, I know this doesn’t make sense. Don’t mind me thinking out loud ya?

So you see, there are actually many ways you can escape from Examon’s clutches.

It all depends on whether you have the courage to follow-your-heart-first-talk-later. Oh damn, I sound so irresponsible. And I’m talking as if I’ve been studying like crazy and therefore have all the rights in the world to talk like this. *自 high*